I want to be richer

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

We are so totally set!

Things have been looking a little bleak lately - funny since my energy levels have been way up, and I’ve been pushing Carlita out of the way to do the vacuuming. Practically unheard of! - and for a while there we thought that we were going to have to skip summer this year, as if Santa forgot to bring us summer vacation, you know, if Christmas was in the summer, like down under (those freaks!)

But it appears we’re catching a much needed break. I can hold on to my road trip fantasies, which include a car stereo we don’t yet own, and a toddler who just loves to drive for hours on end - which I’m sure is why it’s called a fantasy. I am also fantasizing about the route I would pick out for us, were I to actually bother to do anything of the sort, but we all know I’m not, and so it will surprise me greatly if we actually make it out the driveway for a trip further than to the mall. The route would the scenic, with lots of opportunity for photo-taking.

There has also been much talk about “dumpsters” being “hired” to take away all the overflow of junk that is threatening to burst this house at the seams. As a sort of side note to that fantasy is the one where we also clear parts of the old chicken house to make room for a future studio for me. But then I AM big on dreaming.

And then, then there is the one fantasy where I make sweet love to my husband. The one where I feel the force of life growing, once more, inside my belly, until I burst in agony and joy.

We don’t know if, we don’t know when, but it is the guessing that keeps me going.

He came back!

Monday, May 26, 2008

Things seem to have calmed down a little lately. And by lately, I mean the past 12 hours or so, when Jelly Man finally came home from Latvia. I seriously don’t know how single parents do it, but I guess they did like I did, except for longer periods of time, and I’m not sure I would have lasted another day (we were totally out of food when he got back - I was secretly considering a toddler steak in case he got delayed for whatever reason..)

I’ve managed some weird things lately, as well. I wrote “USA” on a package with a Calgary address, even though I know better, and didn’t think of it until the package was in the mail. I did about a ton of laundry, and when it was all clean I folded that shit (and I folded it good!), sorted it and put it.. like.. in the, whotzit called?.. yes, the closet!

I KNOW!

I’m just as shocked as anyone would be.

I still have a million things to do, but because my partition went *poof* this weekend some of it will have to wait. I’m slightly worried there will be no resurrection, but the thought is so nauseating that I’m not even going to go there. Instead I’m going to direct all that nervous energy on Carlita’s upcoming birthday bash. Two years, people, she will be TWO! (July 31st, mark your calendars!) I still can’t believe it.. As she is totally obsessed with balloons these days we pretty much have a theme picked out already (which, balloons, don’t actually make a theme in itself (themselves?), but we figured quantity will make up for quality in this once-in-a-lifetime occasion.)

And, as suspected, there is a plethora of gossip about S. from this weekend, but I’ll spare you - and not because I’m a decent person (geez!) - but because it’s all rather repetitive I’m afraid. The dude has no imagination, no sense of adventure. Oh well..

Home alone

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Jelly Man is off to Latvia tonight, and after we make sure Carlita and I have everything we could possibly need from the grocery store (enough stuff to survive for a couple of months, in case he gets lost) I’m going to wave bye bye to him at the door, then come in here and turn the computer off. It’s a little experiment I’m doing, just for the sake of checking if I’m able to. Cause I don’t think I can, and that would confirm my suspicion that I am terribly addicted to the internet, and that would be a very bad thing.

I know, me addicted to the internet, crazy!

There is lots to do around the house anyway, and plus, I want to try and make this extra special bonding time between Carlita and I. This is going to be the first time I spend this much time with her alone - and I’m not going to lie, it scares the shit out of me. But I think I can rise to the challenge nevertheless. I might even take her for a walk up the forest road, we haven’t been there since she was still in her stroller. And bubbles, there will be lots of soap bubbles! And time spent outside, especially if it’s not hailing like yesterday.

So, yes, I might cave in one evening, but otherwise I don’t think I will get back to posting until Monday’ish. But, because I promised, I will get a picture of the new car and upload to flickr later today - it turns out it was a very real car indeed. And it’s spacy! And I don’t hate it! Give it a year or two and I might have an opportunity to, but for now all seems a-OK. It even gets a little gold star for having tinted windows in the back. No more need for those damn Winnie the Pooh screens whose suction cups detach from the window every other week.

Unfortunately, the car is also still very white. It’ll take me a while to stomach that, I think, but I got used to the green Lada - I should be able to overlook this minor detail given some time. Funny thing is, I might not have had as bad a reaction to a rust colored car as I did this white one, but I’m quirky like that. All in all I’m glad Jelly Man isn’t a car nut. We have a small child, and we are maybe possibly planning a second tot, so how long would a new car stay new anyway? This car will last us a couple of years, hopefully, and once we don’t have toddlers in the car, and we can afford to, a brand new car might be fun to splurge on. Now, not so much.

So, it comes as no surprise that I’m utterly disgusted with S. and his Latest Greatest Thing In The World, another high cost gadget that will fail to make him happy, just like all the other expensive gadgets he has bought the past couple of years have failed to make him even a little bit happier. You’ve got to wonder how long someone can keep up that kind of consumerism/therapy without once turning to themselves and ask if all these materialistic possessions actually help them feel more whole, or if it just leaves a hole in their pocket.

And why do certain people make their own family their enemy? What is the point marrying someone if you then spend a lot of energy on getting the hell out of the house?

Ach, you know, no ordinary people would - but then I’m not talking about your average joe, I’m talking about S.

And now I’m off to put some more laundry in the machine. If I keep this up I might demolish the heap this weekend! (Yeah, riiight..)

I swear, it’s not imaginary

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

We had hail today.

I’s been 12 days since he called home to tell me he got us a new car. He will finally be bringing it home tonight, or so he says. To be honest, I’ll believe it when I see it, physically, in front of me. I’m preparing to be bitter and upset about the car, just so as I won’t be disappointed. For all I know, on his way home he will encounter someone, who will lie down in the middle of the street to get him to pull over, and then they’ll pull away with screeching tires while cackling madly.

I know, I’ve got some really optimistic and awesome habits. Maybe it’s time to consider medication?

*cough*

On a different note, I’m going slightly panicky, because, dude, we’re running low on my favorite soap, and I’m in no financial position to restock just now. To make a little money I’m selling off some of my less used BPAL over at the bpal.org forum, but I thought I’d mention it here too, just in case someone might be interested in what I’ve got (email or leave comment!). I know, I know - you probably don’t even know what bpal is, and if so I apologize.

Also, Carlita is turning more and more toddleresque. It’s getting increasingly annoying that we can’t communicate like humans between the three of us. There is lots of pointing and moderate grunting, and a few meaningful syllables, but that is as interactive as it gets. It hasn’t escaped us that she plays ignorant just to get away with stuff she knows she isn’t allowed to do - like, say, pull the tail off the cat for the 50th time in a day.

Me: “Don’t do that, no Carlita, quit it”

Carlita: - continues pulling

Me: “No, Carlita, no, don’t, no, Carlita, CARLA!“

Carlita: *grin* *pull* *pull*

And later..

Carlita: - pointing an accusatory finger and yelling “Duga duga dew!! Duga duga dew DEW!!!“

Tsk, all that pointing and yelling - wonder where she gets it from..